Forgiveness and Disordered
Eating
This article is excerpts from the Chapter-Finding
the Way to Forgiveness from the book
"Hope,
Help, & Healing for Eating Disorders" by Dr. Jantz
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Forgiveness is a major destination on your healing journey. If
the child of the past and the adult of the present are to integrate fully into
the healed person of the future, there comes a time to release the hurts of the
past, to forgive. Forgiveness builds a solid foundation so you can grow beyond
the hurt and pain fueling your anger and your eating disorder. You can take
control over your pain through the act of forgiveness instead of through the
actions of your eating disorder.
Forgiveness doesn't mean you forget what was done to you, but
that you forgive those responsible, whether they deserve your forgiveness or
not.
Roadblocks to Recovery
Anger, fear, shame, and guilt-the debilitating emotions you've been feeling―get
in the way of being able to experience forgiveness. These emotions have been
companions up to now. They will not want to be left behind.
As you come to acknowledge the truth about the pain you've been
feeling, you will experience the anger you've been suppressing through your
eating disorder. This anger is familiar, but without the confines of the eating
disorder, it may seem overwhelming. that danger is to want to remain angry,
wallowing in blame, which only leads to more anger. You need to move beyond
blame and toward forgiveness. Forgiveness is the balm that allows your soul to
heal and you to grow beyond your pain and anger.
Showing forgiveness, even to the person who admits no need
for it, allows you to show a healing example of what love and acceptance are all
about. If you did not receive love and acceptance from the ones who hurt you ,
or if they were deficient in their ability to love you, you can give love and
forgiveness to those persons as precious gifts,. In this way, you can break the
cycle of an unloving response. Forgiveness means letting go and getting on with
life.
Roadblocks to Forgiveness
Forgiving someone is never easy. It does not happen overnight, it is a
process.
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Beware of the need to punish
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Beware of the desire to continue focusing on yourself
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Beware of the belief that you deserve to be hurt and
miserable
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Beware of pride
Your eating disorder is a response to your pain and anger. If
you can understand what happened, get the past the anger, and forgive the pain,
the reason for your behavior will no longer exist. When the reason no longer
exists, and the health-related complications of your behavior are addressed,
true healing becomes a reality.
Read our Special Report on the Principles of
Forgiveness.
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